hoarding/au revoir...a jamais?!

"valerie look at all the goodies we got from the travel convention we performed at! which of these do you want?"



the answer was none. it was like i was speaking a foreign language that i didn't accept cheap things i would never use. how many cardboard fans and plastic beads do you need when you're not mardi gras? 0
in 5 years, you'll see my parents house on hoarders

along with that note, i gave my parents a near 60 day notice that i'm moving out and into pam's apartment in january. they tried to convince me out of it- i'm sure because they love my wit and joy i bring to the house. mostly though, it's probably because they're afraid i'll take baby z away from them. charlie bought a fur blanket to put over her while she sleeps because it's getting cold. pretttyyyy adorable:::::



je rigole, it's not au revoir a jamais - the lease is up end of july, and pammy's leaving the furniture there, so i'll have the chance to move back to laundry and cooked oatmeal in a few months if i'm too lazy to warm up the instant oatmeal in the microwave. also my bed/furniture will stay here, so i could come back and relive my current life. come visit in january!!!

meeting that i missed on campus

my first thought was because i didn't want to work at macdonald's....

sunday conversations

(dad singing bieber songs to himself)
me (to dad): are you bored? like in life?
dad: what do you mean? (pause) well i'm gassy...

gossip news in the house

number of times that dad has mentioned bieber and his potential baby momma in the past 24 hours = 5
i was away for 12 of those hours. someone has a mancrush.

presents

My dad saw fake tattoo sleeves and he thought that I would like it. The presents from dad this year include a stun gun, brass knuckles, and now fake tattoo sleeves:



I think that he wants me to back back to my past like ice cube. holllaaaa

theme of the month: asian wisdom

mom: are you going to put your maiden name as your kid's middle name?
me: i'm watching tv
mom: you never know who you are marrying the US because people don't have their mother's maiden names in their whole name. for all you know, americans can be marrying their cousins! maybe that's why so many of them have issues. how do you really know if someone isn't your cousin?

and maybe in her random ranting, there is some rhyme and reason:

monday support continues:parental

(me trying on my black swan costume)

charlie: i don't like it. you see a roll of back fat. yeah, a lot of back fat.

mom (look of horror): you're going to wear that?!? seriously?

charlie: why don't you wear a black tshirt and leggings instead. i'll give you a lightsaber and you can go as a jedi. it will fit you so much better.

what my parents apparently envision for halloween: